May 2016
"A Whole Amakamedia"
Dear diary, this is not one of my favourite days. Few hours ago I was complaining to a friend how being unable to do anything worthwhile makes me feel.
She didn't believe me. She casually said, "Taah! Lemme hear word. A whole Amakamedia cannot be saying this."
She said it lightly but it sank deep into my heart.
W-h-o-l-e.
I hear me screaming within.
I don't feel "whole". Can't you see I am broken? Can't you see?
I feel so inadequate right now. I feel so lost and I don’t know what to do anymore. I wish that I could just get a clear message so I know what I should do. I almost do. Actually, I do know what I need to do but, I don't know.
I don't feel "whole". Can't you see I am broken? Can't you see?
I feel so inadequate right now. I feel so lost and I don’t know what to do anymore. I wish that I could just get a clear message so I know what I should do. I almost do. Actually, I do know what I need to do but, I don't know.
Where has she gone?!
Is she missing?
Is she hiding?
or Is she seeking?
I have to find her . . . I want to see her again.
- Dear Diary, Nothing Is Working
- Dear Diary, I Am hearing Voices
- Dear Diary, This Holiday Is Making Sense
- He called My Mum His Mother-in-Law
***
P. S This was how I felt last month but I feel so blessed right now. I am whole.What does it mean to be WHOLE?
To be whole is to be full of grace and truth.
When we feel inadequate, it’s scary. It feels like a huge risk – we might fail, make a fool of ourselves or mess up. But when we trust God with our little, He transforms the not good enough into something big.
Question: What would you do when someone who places you more highly than you place yourself - step up to become what they see or tell them you're not all that?
Written by Nwamaka Ajaegbu
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Email: amakamedia@yahoo.com
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Follow on Instagram: @amakamedia
Email: amakamedia@yahoo.com
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Heart Rays . . . giving out the light.
